Affiliate Program
Frequently Asked Questions

"Vaat iz thee Affiliate Progrum? How Doth Et Vorketh?
Thiee Affiliate Program iz an on-line culture disemination friendship between and vu, izn't dat vundaphul! VUu gennerat p0Sitiiv-Anteye-conSUmMah-vibpes throoOugh cahrma kOmeelieeon kummissons ...>hick<...xcuz mi...err'nd ahn AL zaals ma'd throeu a l'inc un vour zite. Ve prahveyed jyu bahn..ners 'n logos ...hehe...lowgoes ...hehe... fur yr zite vicH l'inc twoOo" [ Get this guy outta here, he's friggin' drunk, whoever hired him is getting fired, oh screw it; pink slips for everyone, sheesh whattan outfit we got going here...ok who's next, hey Sven get over here...] "Ven a vizitwor vrum vour zite vliiks vrough two ovrs, vi vrack vat ustovver'z urzhaze axzivity un vay 10% kummiszion ov knet zales un anvy orver vlaced." [ I'm getting a pounding headache, who else do we have left, after the cut backs, to complete this project for Snuggles...How about Xian Xu? She can read right... actually i don't care just get her in here...] "Hai Wee tra'kow dat di...cussto-mahh wats ree-pher'd zo ous zy zo'r syte an' vek'rd zee a'mo'nt ov zale. NoNONo no STOP... I can do this, you xiao didi hanzi, Xian Xan iz a shabi pengke nuguan zhuyi zhe lihai and you can't hold me back, i quit!" [ we're never going to get through about Bob from accounting, you mean the guy with the 'issues', yes him, he's all we got left, he can handle the rest of the website agreements, can't screw it up any worse... Wait on second thought, go online and find someone elses stupid legal mumbo jumbo and we'll just modify their agreement, it easier that way and if they sue, we're broke anyway, sure they will take away 5+ years of our life, by tying us up in litigation, but well there's a point in here somewhere and i'm not at liberty to say what it is, so get Bob in here and let him "revise" someone elses agreement stuffs. ok Bob you understand what your suppost to do.] [ Great! go to town...] "Then every month/year/hour we tally your .Biz-Arrow .Com-Missions and new customer carmas and send you a notification of being a swell individual. If your .Biz-Arrow .Com-Missions and rewards Karma points for the month totals less than $50 (fourty nine ninety nine retail), we continue to accrue your .Biz-Arrow .Com-Mission notifications until you reach (and it's a stretch) $50 (exactly) in .Biz-Arrow .Com-Missions and rewards Karma Points and send you a notification of being a swell individual at the end of that month's cycle. It's that simple. Duh."

Why Choose the, Opps I mean Affiliate Program?
We have nationally unrecognized unbrand poorly named artist -- built on days of reliablely remarkable achievements and great sounds -- as the largest "FreeSpeechForSale" retainer in the whole universe as described in those Steven Hawking books. We pay nothing, but you get personal satisfaction on every link clicked (even the ones you do yourself to run up your total) -- specialty gifts not provided or encourage into a life of crime and generic items found only on our site are sometimes orange. The amount of .Biz-Arrow .Com-Missions you can earn is unlimited, Karma doesn't exist! We provide the highest level of customer dis-service and athletic support, for all sexes. We fulfill desires for our mp3s and upload content from Direct's website.

How Do I Know That You Know That I Know How Much Karma I Should be Granted?
We do all the tracking for you. (Convient; we think so) Once you have been approved, or take the initiative and steal for yourself and your site links have been established, you can get something, I haven't been informed of what that is yet. Your results are updated at a time frame I'm unaware of to provide you the latest (that's debateable) info+pr0n you need to monitor your performance and better manage your affiliate relationship with You will receive +2b8 Karma .Biz-Arrow .Com-Missions on ALL inter-website generated link-passages through your site. Your .Biz-Arrow .Com-Missions and earthly rewards will be.

How Much Does it Take to Join?
Nothing! Itís absolutely FREE. There is no application fee or minimum Zuba kNet Zales requirements.

Who Can Participate?
All you need is a Web site, ISP, internet connection, e-mail provider, Hosting, domain registry, continuous supply of $ to keep all this going, and some patience. We want to work with all sites from large community to larger community to humongoid community to so bloated and bursting at the seems community it's immobile and shopping sites to individual web pages, and everything up between. Anything may submit an application. Sites that contain or link to inappropriate content or objectionable material are eligible to participate in our affiliate program. See our Affiliate Agreement for specifics.

Who Cannot Participate?
Me. I've banned myself, why you ask, because... well, everyone needs an enemy and for the time being i'm that individual.

Will I Earn .Biz-Arrow .Com-Missions on My Own Downloads Through My Site?
You get +2b8 Karma on ALL link transferals at made through your link.

How Do I Create Links to
It's easy! Once you have been accepted into our affiliate program, we provide you with all the tools and banners you need - even beginners can create links in just seconds or hours depending on your skillz.

Can I add additional websites (URL's) to my account without submitting a new application?
Yes! As long as your additional sites are in accordance with our Affiliate Agreement (is this even possible have you read that thing?), all you need to do is e-me the additional SITE NAME and SITE URL* to

*Please be sure to include the complete address for each additional URL. You will receive a confirmation e-mail when your account has been updated. After you receive your confirmation e-mail, you may create links on the new sites and begin receiving credit for sales and traffic. For the heck of it send some e-me's back and forth for further confirmations, some people get hooked on confirmations and lead very shallow lives, we're happy to facilitate this mental difficiency.

How long does it take for Zuba kNet Zales and .Biz-Arrow .Com-Missions revenue to show on my reports?
Orders placed before 12:00pm (EST), will appear on your Zuba kNet Zales report the following day. (maybe) Your revenue report (which shows your affiliate earnings) will appear after your entire order has been shipped.(maybe) Unless our server goes down, downloads generally happen immediately or hours from when the request was placed.

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